


Nightmare

by CourtNicxVoltronxYJ



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Concerned Friends, Depressed Keith (Voltron), Depression, Gen, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Insomnia, Keith (Voltron) has insomnia, Keith (Voltron) is a Mess, Nightmares, Panic Attacks, Relapse, keith has a nightmare
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-26
Updated: 2018-06-26
Packaged: 2019-05-28 17:49:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,053
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15054533
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CourtNicxVoltronxYJ/pseuds/CourtNicxVoltronxYJ
Summary: Keith has a nightmare and he struggles to/can't let the team get close.





	Nightmare

**Author's Note:**

> I do want to put a trigger warning here because there is a tiny bit of self harm in it, not a lot but I do want to add this just to be safe.  
> I know that sometimes reading self harm fics can be a trigger, believe me I know and at times when I am low I seek out those types of fics so I can have something to connect and relate to.
> 
>  
> 
> -Plus, please tell me in the comments at the end of this fic if you think I should add another chapter to this. Thanks to all who read this, it means a lot to see others read my works!

After a long and tiring mission, the paladins went to got get clean and changed. Almost all of them went to the kitchen to grab something to eat, all but one. 

Keith after stripping out of his paladin armor went straight to the training room. He worked and worked himself until he felt like he was on the edge of passing out. His limbs were heavy, weighed down as he dragged them forwards. He at first was going to make his way to his bedroom but the distance between the training room and his bedroom seemed to be too far at the moment, so he sighed and started to make his way towards the lounge.

Inside the room was all of the paladins, laying around and relaxing. Pidge was sitting on the floor with their laptop on their lap typing away at something. Shiro was reading something as both Hunk and Lance were laughing at something.  
Keith slowly made his way into the room and over towards one of the couches. He sat down, glanced over at the others before curling up into a small ball, laying his head down upon the armrest and surprisingly falling asleep very quickly.

Keith has insomnia and there are just times, days when he just can't get himself to sleep or to sleep more than 3 to 4 hours a night. The lack of sleep, the constant working out, the heavy and stressful missions were slowly building up and pushing down on him. He began to not think clearly and his focus went right out the window. He was tired and more on edge which just made him grumpy and a target for Lance to mess with him about. 

Keith couldn't remember the last time he actually got a good night's rest. So as he curled up on the couch, he quickly drifted off to the sounds of Hunk's and Lance's voices, the turning of the pages of the book Shiro was reading and the soft tapping sound coming from Pidge's keyboard. Keith sighed as a weight felt like it was lifting off of his shoulders.

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------

The others hadn't noticed that Keith had entered the room until they heard some whimpers and mumbled words, Keith pleading in his sleep and then eventually crying.

Everyone's eyes darted over to their red sleeping paladin that was curled up on the corner of the couch. His hands were in tight fists, his knuckles turning white. He was shaking his head and biting down upon his lower lip before he began to cry out.

"N-No...no, no, no. I don't....st-stop! No Please! Stop!!" cried out Keith. 

Everyone in the whole room was very worried about their friend and teammate and slowly grew closer towards him, calling out to him.

"Keith? Keith my man it's alright" said Lance.

"It's just a dream buddy" said Hunk as he frowned down at his friend.

"Hey Keith? Keith can you hear me?" questioned Shiro.

"KEITH!!" Pidge yelled and Keith bolted up quickly from his curled spot on the couch. Pidge's yelling the only one that broke through his nightmare.

Everything was blurry and out of focus for him. He reached up to rub his eyes and could feel his hands shaking like crazy.

 

"Are you okay?" a voice asked, causing Keith to jump and glance over at whomever said it. He right then remembered that he hadn't made it back to his room, that he was in the lounge where anyone and everyone could see him. This new thought made Keith inhale sharply as his vision began to slowly come into focus. 

"You were screaming and crying in your sleep,'' Lance said as he took a step forward towards Keith but Shiro placed his hand upon Lance's shoulder to stop him. Shiro looked sadly over at Keith, his little brother who he knew has been through so much pain in his life.

He swung his head around to see his whole team minus Coran and Allura staring at his, just watching him with concern. And that for some reason made a knot inside his chest tighten, he knew that they weren't really concerned for him, that they now saw him as the weak being he truly was. It wasn't truly concern held in their eyes but pity. 

"Did you have another nightmare?" asked Shiro.

He hated how that sounded, how it implied that he had nightmares a lot, that he wasn't strong.  
Keith bit his bottom lip before bolting up off the couch and dashing off towards his room, where he could lock the door and feel semi safe in the darken room of his.

Once inside, Keith pulled his knees up to his chest and hugged them tightly. His breathing had quicken and he was going into full panic attack mode.

Everyone had seen him. 

They saw how weak and a freak he was.

 

He feared that he was going to lose all of them and that's when his mind began to attack him. His depression had came out to play and it sadly wasn't a game Keith wanted to be apart of anymore. His mind screamed out horrible and hurtful things, making Keith feel that much worst about himself and before his mind had caught up to what he was doing, he was already drawing his blade across his skin. 

After about a few cuts, some deeper than others was when the tears really began to fall down his face.

He had relapsed. 

He had been 3 months clean from cutting and one stupid nightmare, his friends seeing him and his dark and depressed mind and he was cutting again. 

Sobs burst through him and at this moment he truly couldn't care if the others could hear him. He felt so ashamed. He felt like a failure.

He balled up into a little ball, shaking and crying his sore and broken heart out. He couldn't hear the others footsteps coming down the hallway, or their voices as they called out to him, asking if he was alright, even though by the sound of it he wasn't. He couldn't focus or hear the knocks that fell upon his metal door as he was dragged off into the darkness, passing out just as the light from the hallways spilled inside his black, cold room.

**Author's Note:**

> Considering that this fic does mention depression and contains self harm in it, I would like to add the national suicide prevention lifeline number here. I know that depression is very hard and even though someone says that you are not alone, you just can't accept or feel that, but if you need help do try to reach out for some help and I know, way easier said than done, believe me.
> 
> National Suicide Prevention Lifeline:  
> Call 1-800-273-8255  
> Available 24 hours everyday plus there is an online chat which maybe easier for those (like myself) who have difficulties talking on the phone.


End file.
